Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Swag Ho Monday: DIY T-Shirt Reconstruction (Tutiorial Edition!)

TWO Mondays in a row missed and nobody said a damn thing! You guys are too nice to me. Or you don’t care. I’ll take it.

Since today is Monday on a technicality, and also because yesterday happens to be my second most hated day of the year (first most hated day is the day the clocks turn back) I took the day off. But never fear, hopefully the wait will be worth it – I have a gift for you on this week’s swag ho edition. Because a beach dress is just what you need now that summer is unofficially and depressingly over, I give you...

My first-ever awkward tutorial! 

What makes it awkward? Observe my modeling "skills". Painful.

Let me just say that I love Coppertone. I love the way it smells, I love the girl’s cute little tan-lined butt cheeks. I love how she's all, "Oops! This dog is ripping my bikini bottom off, but who cares? I don't have a top on, anyway! Let's DO THIS!"

Image borrowed from pierjewelry.com

I distinctly remember, as a child, wanting to be tan just like the little Coppertone girl. And look at me now… sometimes I get so tan that I can actually see a little bit of disgust register on people’s faces when they see me. And it makes me proud! I have a problem! YAY!

It seems the little tan Coppertone girl is tan no more, though. Sadly for me and the rest of us hard core Jersey broads, tanning is going the way of smoking. It’s no longer cool to be tan. It’s apparently gross. And I guess little kids' butt cheeks are out now, too. Thanks a lot, cancer and pedophiles. Way to ruin things for the rest of us.

Check out the Coppertone Girl’s new PC image on this shirt I got:

Just like a Ken doll, this chick has no butt crack.
I don’t typically wear men’s size large t-shirts except to sleep in, and I'm not about to sentence this cute shirt to never see the light of day.

I knew I wanted to make it into a beach dress, so that’s what I did. And you can, too! It’s easy! Here’s how you do it, in four easy steps. Five, if you're feeling ambitious:

Cut the neck and sleeves off.

Fold the shirt in half lengthwise and cut slits about an inch apart going down the sides. You can go as far up and down as you want.This will make loops up both sides of the shirt.

This part looks trickier than it is. Take the second loop from the top and pull it up through the top loop. Now take the next loop down and pull it through the loop you're holding. Then the next one, and so on until you get to the bottom. Cut that slit in half and tie it in a knot to end the chain.

Pull down on the hem of the shirt to make it look like this:

Fold the shirt in half the other way, by pulling the front and the back midpoints away from each other. Then cut strips in the back section. For mine, I made them gradually less wide as they went down the back, so it makes a triangle pointing to my own tan-lined butt cheeks. Don’t go too low, or else you’ll end up with a tangled mess of a shirt that’s annoying to put on.

And that’s it! If you feel like sewing or you want to make it longer (I did) you can cut the bottom off of another t-shirt and just sew it to the bottom of the one you just ruined – I mean… made into a couture, avant garde piece of fashion.

You can cut the hem off the bottom to make it less polished-looking, or you can sew another tshirt to the bottom.
If you try this, let me know how it turns out!

1 comment:

  1. Such an easy DIY. I have lots of old t-shirts and I could now use them to try my hands of your tutorial. I don't know if it will come out as good as your but I can atleast try. Thank you, you did a job well done.


let's get awkward!